


Hellfire

by humanbin



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:21:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29706735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/humanbin/pseuds/humanbin
Summary: This is also on Wattpad under the same title. It's not plagiarism, it's me under a different username.I do not own any of the characters used in this work.
Relationships: Regulus Black/James Potter
Comments: 3
Kudos: 2





	1. Sirius

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my beta readers that will stay anonymous. You guys are troopers.  
> 

Regulus was reading in his room when he heard a soft knock on his door. “Come in,” He responded, already knowing it was his older brother, Sirius. His father never came into his room, and his mother would have rapped harshly on the door, if bothering to knock at all.

Sirius opened the door slowly, poking his head in to meet his brother’s eyes before coming into the bedroom, quickly closing the door behind him. “Watcha reading?” Sirius asked, making to grab the book out of Regulus’ hands. Regulus moved faster than him, though, and swiftly pulled the book out of his reach.

“None of your business, really,” Regulus replied, tucking a bookmark between the pages and setting it on his bedside table. “But if you must know, it’s _Hogwarts: A History._ ”

Sirius grinned, sitting on the bed without invitation. Regulus didn’t protest; Sirius had never had the same need for privacy as him, but he couldn’t begrudge him for it. “Someone a little nervous to go off, ickle firstie? Never would’ve taken you as one to have jitters.”

“Shut up,” Regulus grumbled, looking away from his brother. Sirius was right, of course. He was nervous, terrified, even, of leaving for his first year at Hogwarts. But there was no way he’d understand or take him seriously; Sirius saw no problem with not being sorted into Slytherin, or not making good impressions, or disappointing his parents. Last year, Sirius had been sorted into Gryffindor, made a name for himself as a prankster, and befriended muggleborns and blood-traitors alike, all, at least originally, to spite their parents. They had been furious, of course; their image was being actively tarnished by their firstborn son, and he had no intent on stopping. Sirius delighted in their upset.

Sure, Regulus thought it was incredibly brave of him for standing up against the absolute terrors that were their parents, and couldn’t help but marvel at how he took the howlers and, when he arrived home for Christmas, the bruises, in stride. He had always considered Sirius to be the epitome of bravery, and that courage spilled out of his brother these days. 

But at the same time, Regulus couldn’t be completely thrilled with this behaviour. While Sirius had enjoyed a year free from shouting, cold rooms, and dreadful family gatherings, the expectations for Regulus had heightened exponentially. His parents, while not expressing it outright, had made it very clear that Regulus was going to be expected to pick up where Sirius had left off, pleasing relatives and telling them what they wanted to hear. Not that Sirius had ever done that, mind you. All the carting around was making Regulus an excellent liar.

Sirius caught on to Regulus’ upset; he had always been able to read people well, not unlike their parents. Regulus hated it. “Hey, it’s fine if you’re nervous. I was too, but there’s really nothing to worry about.”

Regulus didn’t meet his eyes, and instead shrugged his shoulders. “Sure,” he said noncommittally, not wanting an argument. Sirius was his only friend, apart from the house elves, which weren’t great secret keepers or nearly as entertaining. “What do you need? You didn’t come in here to chat about _my_ business.”

Sirius sighed quietly. He was frustrated, Regulus knew, but he was going to have to deal with that. There wasn’t a lot of comfort to be given under the watch of the House of Black. “We’re going to Diagon Alley this afternoon. Dad’s taking us, since he has a meeting in Knockturn Alley about something or other. We leave at four o’clock.”

“Okay. Do you still want to shop together, if we’re being left to it?”

Regulus finally looked to Sirius when there wasn’t an immediate response, to find his brother looking back at him. His eyes were a little sad, and his thoughts were so loud that they were basically Regulus’ own: _Does he really think I’d leave him?_ “No, I don’t, not really,” Regulus answered, “But I figured you might have wanted to go off by yourself, maybe find some other Gryffindors. I know I’m not much fun.”

“Hate when you do that,” Sirius sighed, “Feels like I’ve got no privacy, not even in my own head.”

“I’d never do it on purpose.” Regulus gave Sirius an apologetic smile. “But you think so loud sometimes, and I don’t like when you’re upset, you know that.”

“Yeah, yeah, you big sap,” Sirius finally grinned back at him. _Thank Merlin,_ Regulus thought to himself. He was glad Sirius couldn’t hear him back. “Anyways, it’s not like I can get in touch with anyone to make plans; my owl’s still on the mend from the Potters’ rosebushes last week.

“Didn’t Mum tell you not to talk to the Potters?” Regulus asked. He immediately regretted his question, feeling the wave of Sirius’ annoyance wash over him. “I’m not going to tell! I was just asking.”

Sirius got up from the bed, scowling. “Mum also told you you’re going to marry that Greengrass girl that’s a decade older than you,” he said curtly. “Mum isn’t always right. I’ll see you at four, if you’re still coming.” And with that, he exited the bedroom, leaving Regulus alone again. 

Regulus sighed. _I’m sorry,_ he thought, as loud as he could, hoping it might make it through the layers of walls and magic that lined the old house, and help console his brother. He really didn’t mean it that way. When he received no response, he sighed again, returning to his chapter on the moving staircases with more worry than he had started with.

***

When Regulus arrived in the front sitting room at five to four, both his father and Sirius were already there, much to Regulus’ surprise. Usually, Sirius made it a point to show up exactly one minute after he was expected to be somewhere, especially when summoned by family. However, any confusion regarding his punctuality was quickly dismissed as Regulus watched him pull down the sleeve of his jumper, which was much too warm to be wearing in the late August heat. Sirius did not meet Regulus’ eyes, which further confirmed his suspicions. Regulus did his best to remember whether he still had any wound-cleaning potion left in his sock drawer for when they arrived home.

“I unfortunately shan’t be present for your wand selection,” Began Orion, evenly and without much regret. Emotion wasn’t of utmost importance in the Black household, and Regulus didn’t take his father’s apathy to heart. “I have an important luncheon I must attend. You two have your allotted amounts. What you do with them is up to you.” Regulus felt to make sure he had his pouch of Galleons, and was relieved he did; he didn’t feel like being chided today, especially not by their father. “You two first,” Orion said, gesturing to the fireplace curtly.

Sirius finally looked to Regulus as the both made their way to stand in the fireplace, Floo Powder in hand. Regulus could tell that he was still upset with him, but simultaneously wanted to be able to seek comfort in his younger brother. Predictable as always. Regulus waited until they were both stationary in the fireplace, before tossing his handful of powder directly upwards, Sirius following suit. “Diagon Alley,” they both spoke, looking directly into each others’ eyes before Regulus felt the twist of his gut, closing his eyes.

When he opened them again, the two Black heirs stood at the edge of a bustling crowd. Before them sat the entirety of Diagon Alley, which they both had frequented only a handful of times before. The streets were full of wizards; some quietly snaking their way through the streets, some wrangling noisy children, some holding hands with their spouses, tuned out of the world around them. When Regulus looked behind them, their father wasn’t there; already disappeared off to Knockturn Alley, where he probably wouldn’t return from until late that night, if it was like any other ‘luncheon’ he was off on these days.

Regulus looked at Sirius. The older of the two looked stern, but his eyes were bright, dancing with mischief and excitement that Regulus rarely saw. He wondered if it came out of hiding when he was at school, away from their parents and the House of Black. _Away from me,_ came the voice in Regulus’ head, which he pushed back into a dark corner. “Florean Forstescue’s first, then?” he wondered aloud, watching as Sirius looked to him.

“I like the way you think, Reggie,” Sirius grinned, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him deeper into the crowd.

Regulus wondered, to himself this time, if he could smile like Sirius. He didn’t know if he could smile, _really_ smile, at all. He’d have to try at some point. Maybe when he got to Hogwarts, it would pop out of him, as easy as it had come to Sirius. Everything always seemed to come easy to Sirius.


	2. First Impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regulus gets his wand and runs into a very kind, very Quidditch-obsessed boy.

After a couple of hours, it was Regulus who broached the topic of the brothers splitting up. “I have to go get my wand,” He started, waiting as Sirius adjusted his shopping bag to fit his new textbooks. “If it’s all the same to you, I’d like to go alone. Nothing against you, I just want to focus on the task at hand.”

Sirius looked up from the bag with a look of mild surprise. “Of course,” he said, “look at ickle Reggie, going out into the world on his own!”

“Save it,” Regulus snorted, “and stop calling me that. Meet you back at Obscurus Books? I’d like to pick up some books to read for fun between homework.”

It was Sirius’ turn to laugh at his brother. “Reading for fun,” he teased, “you sound like one of my friends.” Sirius never mentioned names, other than the Potter surname, but Regulus knew he meant Remus - his name was the only one Sirius couldn’t hide from him. Not that he knew that. “But yes, Obscurus, try to be there before dark so I don’t lose you.” Regulus nodded, and they went their separate ways without additional goodbyes.

Ollivander’s was a narrow little shop front between two larger novelty shops, with peeling gold letters and a dusty display window which held a single wand placed in the center of an equally dusty purple cushion. Regulus had a hard time believing such a decrepit little place could even be open for business, let alone be home to one of the most respected Wandmakers of the wizarding world. Regardless of his reservations, Regulus turned the tarnished brass doorknob and stepped inside.

The interior of the Wandmaker’s shop was equally tiny, though marginally less dusty than it appeared from the outside. Though empty of other patrons, the shop itself was chock full; wand boxes were piled up to the ceiling in orderly stacks, making the shop feel impossibly smaller. A barely-standing chair sat in the corner of the room, and a broom was leisurely sweeping what it could of the dust that showed hundreds of footprints from customers past.

“Why, hello, young lad!” 

Regulus startled out of his trance, looking away from the shop’s contents and instead at the kindly old wizard that had appeared out of nowhere. “Hello,” he greeted once he remembered his manners. “I’m assuming you are Mr Ollivander?”

“Why yes I am,” Ollivander smiled, moving forward to extend a hand in greeting. “The youngest Black, yes? You’re much like your brother.”

“Regulus,” he nodded, taking the Wandmaker’s hand and shaking it firmly as he was taught, trying not to think too hard about that last comment. _He didn’t say I looked like him. He said I_ am _like him. What’s that supposed to mean?_

“Very fitting name.” _This man speaks in riddles._ “First wand, yes? Excellent, come right this way,” Ollivander said, answering his own question as he moved to start pulling boxes, the rest of which neatly dropping directly down to fill the previously occupied spaces. 

Regulus moved slightly forward, not wanting to crowd the man as he wondered aloud to nobody in particular. “Black family... Pisces...Very strong minded... Ah! Perfect!” 

Regulus’ head spun trying to digest this man’s strange words as he watched him pluck a black box from the corner of the room, walking leisurely towards the bewildered boy. Ollivander opened the box, revealing a short, pale wand, with a wider base that was inscribed with runes that Regulus hoped his parents wouldn’t be able to read. “Yew, nine inches, dragon heartstring core, unyielding. Go ahead, hold it, see how it feels.”

Regulus followed the man’s instructions, picking up the wand and putting it in his right hand. He hardly needed to adjust his grip; it was as if it had moved to fit comfortably in his hand. It felt as if his fingers had gotten longer, though he knew that was impossible. He tore his attention away from the wand, looking to Ollivander. “Should I…” he trailed off, unsure of what he was asking.

“It appears as though the wand has chosen you,” Ollivander smiled, his eyes twinkling with something Regulus couldn’t quite grasp. “Though you may test it out, if you wish to be certain. That’s it just give it a wave when you’re ready.”

Regulus nodded, feeling a sudden nervousness come on as he looked away. What if the wand hadn’t truly chosen him? What then? _No time for that nonsense,_ he thought, taking a deep breath to vanish those nerves. As he exhaled, be brought the wand up, giving it a gentle swish, not wanting to create any commotion. He felt Ollivander’s eyes on him, the room feeling closer as they waited to see if the wand would respond.

Sure enough, as soon as his lungs had emptied, a breeze of air flowed from the end of his wand as if it had come straight out of him, making a gentle _whooshing_ sound as it cleared the dust from the boxes directly in front of him, before making a full circle of the room, leaving even the well-run floor spotless.

The hush that had fallen over the two wizards, one young, one old, remained for another few moments as Regulus looked around, unsure of his eyes, before looking to the Wandmaker. Ollivander held his tongue, awaiting the quiet, reserved boy’s reaction. Regulus looked away one more time, feeling as an unfamiliar emotion washed over him, traveling from the tips of his toes, up, up, and eventually spreading across his face. He was smiling, an unabashed, toothy grin, and he met Ollivander’s eyes once again to see that they wore matching expressions. “Well done, my boy!” The wandmaker exclaimed, gesturing widely around the shop. “Wonderful execution, and _such_ masterful control from a wee one! Not a speck of dust gone awry! Excellent, _excellent_ job!”

Regulus couldn’t do much more than nod and continue to grin, quickly handing his wand off to be packaged away in case his joy - _joy, that was the feeling_ \- were to get out of hand and cause chaos. He had done magic, on purpose, with a real wand. He had done magic that looked nothing like the magic his parents did, with their sharp incantations and painful results; his had been gentle, productive, even. He couldn’t wait to tell Sirius.

***

While the initial excitement had tapered off in the time it had taken to pay for his wand and exit the shop with a final thank-you to Ollivander, Regulus couldn’t help the small smile that lingered as he crossed the street to Quality Quidditch Supplies. He knew first years weren’t permitted to bring broomsticks, but his and Sirius’ Nimbuses they had at home could do with some care, and he knew Sirius had lent their last bit of broom polish to a friend Regulus didn’t know the name of. 

As Regulus entered the shop, he was immediately met with a similar level of noise and business that the avenue itself was filled with, only much more condensed and almost exclusively school-aged children and teenagers alike. Regulus slipped through the crowd and lines quite easily, given his compact size, eventually making it to the broom maintenance section. The aisle was almost entirely empty, spare one boy, standing directly in front of all the broom polish. _Of course._

Regulus waited politely, regarding the other boy. He was around his age, a little taller, with brown skin and wild black hair that Regulus’ mother would throw a fit over the state of. He wore rectangular glasses and a bright red shirt - Gryffindor colours. His fingers ran repeatedly through his already mussed hair, and the expression on his face was pensive. Regulus didn’t have to check for himself to know that he was genuinely lost in thought, gears turning in his head over some bloody broom polish.

It startled Regulus when the boy looked up at him out of nowhere, seemingly surprised to see him there. “Sorry,” the boy said, dropping his hand to his side. His accent was proper English, much like that of pureblood families like Regulus’. “Didn’t mean to be in the way, go ahead and grab what you need, I’ll move.” He stepped back, making space for Regulus.

Any shred of confidence Regulus had gained from his success with his wand selection was suddenly nowhere to be found. He looked away from the boy’s gaze, knitting his eyebrows. “Er, if I’m completely honest I don’t really know what I’m looking for,” he said honestly. “Usually my brother picks this stuff out.” _Why did he tell him that? Not like he cares._

“Oh!” The boy said, seemingly unbothered by the inconvenience caused by Regulus’ lack of knowledge on broom care. “Well, I’ve got time enough to help you, if you’d like?”

Regulus considered this offer for a moment. Was this random kid really that interested in helping him? But then again, Regulus knew what malice sounded like, and he didn’t pick up even an ounce of it. “Alright,” he agreed, “if it’s no problem, I could use the help.”

“None at all!” The boy chirped. Regulus could hear the _Yes!_ Without even looking for it. This kid really didn’t mind; in fact, his excitement to help basically leapt out of his thoughts. _At this rate, maybe he’s actually a Hufflepuff._ The boy beckoned Regulus closer, and Regulus obliged. “Now, let’s see, what brooms do you and your brother have?”

“Nimbuses,” Regulus responded quickly, “Seventeen Hundreds, I think.”

“Wow, really?” The boy’s eyebrows went up, looking up at Regulus. “My friend has one of those, though I haven’t seen him on it before. I’d love to have one, but I only just got my Fifteen Hundred at Christmas. Anyway, Those have mahogany handles if I remember correctly, so either the Yajirushi or the Silver Arrow, up to you. The Silver Arrow brooms aren't great, but their maintenance line is pretty good - I’m rambling again, sorry,” He cut himself off with a sheepish look, his hand immediately going back to run through his hair.

“No, that’s alright,” Regulus said with a small smile, “it’s nice that you know what you’re talking about. Very helpful.” He realized that he wasn’t lying when he said that; even though he was trying to reassure the boy, he really meant it.

“Oh, cool, I’m glad.” The boy smiled back. His eyes were hazel, Regulus noted, and they had that same spark of mischief that Sirius’ got sometimes. “Anyway, I’ll leave you with that, hope you have some luck with my recommendations. See ya!” He gave a quick wave, leaving Regulus alone in the aisle.

Regulus looked at the options on the shelf, and ended up picking out a large container of Silver Arrow polish, listening to the mystery boy’s advice. It wasn’t until he made it through the long line to pay and was well on his way to Obscurus Books that Regulus realized that the boy had left empty-handed, after spending so much time trying to decide. 

Sirius sat on a bench outside the bookshop, greeting Regulus with a smile and a wave as he approached. “Got your wand?”

Regulus nodded, smiling again as he thought about his afternoon. A perfect wand and a pleasant chance meeting. “Sure did. Stopped at Quality Quidditch, too, needed broom polish. I got the Silver Arrow, hope that works.”

Sirius nodded in approval. “I’ve heard good things about the Silver Arrow, one of my mates likes it quite a lot. Now, let’s get your nerd books and head home, we’re not supposed to wait for Dad.”

Regulus let Sirius lead them into the shop, his mind too busy connecting dots at what Sirius had just said. He was glad he’d made a list of what he’d been looking for, as he couldn’t bring himself to focus at the task of hand. He was quiet for the rest of the day, waiting until excused himself to bed to let himself truly think it, as loud as he could.

_That boy was Sirius’ friend._


	3. Family Relations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regulus and Sirius have tea with the Black-LeStranges. They're both pretty high-strung in this one.  
> Also, we meet Kreacher for the first time.

“Bad news,” Sirius said grimly, once again coming into Regulus’ room. “Our lovely cousin Bella’s here, and she’s brought her delight of a husband.”

“Pity, I’ve almost finished my book. Hate to leave it now,” Regulus replied. It had been almost a week since the brothers’ trip to Diagon Alley, and Regulus had torn through  _ Hogwarts: A History  _ in what must have been record speed. Now that all the shopping was done, the remainder of August was flying away, only increasing his nerves about his first year. “What do they want? I thought I’d done all my parading about, new incoming Slytherin and all.”

“Don’t say that.”

“Say what?”

“The Slytherin bit!” Sirius chided, “you’re such a downer sometimes, Reggie.”

“I’m just saying what they say!” He protested. “You think the Dolohovs want to hear about a Black heir wanting to be a Hufflepuff? And don’t call me that.”

Sirius huffed at that. “Got to use your own words sometimes, brother,” he said, patting Regulus on the shoulder. “Now come on, before whichever LeStrange brother Bella married comes hunting for us.”

It turned out to be Rodolphus that Bellatrix was had been married; their cousin didn’t have time to do much else besides flash her gargantuan ring before disappearing off into one of the many protected studies to discuss  _ important matters  _ with Orion and Walburga, pulling Rodolphus along. Other than the brothers’ short introduction to the new family member, nothing indicated them needing to stay downstairs; nobody else was home, other than the house elves. However, given the usual patterns of visits such as this, mixed with Sirius not vying for another reprimandation, the two decided the best order of business was to wait quietly in the parlour. The brothers couldn’t talk about anything, not really, because of the nosy portraits that lined the corridors surrounding them. Sirius huffed again, and Regulus considered running upstairs to grab his book before he heard a reedy little voice from the edge of the room.

“May Kreacher provide tea for Misters Black?” Regulus turned and smiled to the house elf, who sat politely on the threshold of the doorway into the basement stairs corridor, where the kitchens were. Sirius made a disgruntled sound; he had always hated Kreacher, said that he was creepy and his voice was annoying. Regulus didn’t share those sentiments.

“Hello, Kreacher,” Regulus greeted the elf, “Tea would be lovely, thank you.” Regulus hoped it sounded as genuine as it was. He desperately needed a cup of milky, sweet tea, if he was going to have to suffer through this silence, and even more desperately if Bellatrix was going to interrogate him later in the name of friendly conversation, which she probably would. Kreacher nodded once, before disappearing back to the kitchens to prepare the service.

“I don’t know why you’re so nice to him,” Sirius finally spoke, once they were as alone as they were going to get. “He’s not doing you any massive favour, it’s his job.”

Regulus rolled his eyes. “Just because it’s his job doesn’t mean I should be rude like the rest of you. And if we were ever in any sort of mortal peril, I’d rather have the house elves on my side than not.”

“Whatever.” Sirius said, obviously annoyed. He was getting more and more antsy and irritable as the days barreled closer to the departure of the Hogwarts Express, that much was clear. It was different from Regulus’ own nerves; it sounded like homesickness, if anything, to Regulus. He thought about that for a moment. Did Sirius just miss his friends? Or did he really think of Hogwarts as more of a home than Grimmauld Place? Would Regulus think like that too?”

“Merlin, get out of my head for a moment! You’ve got enough of thinking to do on your own, you don’t need to do mine too,” Sirius snipped, folding his arms.

“Sorry,” Regulus said quietly, feeling the wave coming. He pressed his tongue to the roof of his mouth to keep it at bay. “I can’t control it yet. Maybe I’ll learn at Hogwarts-”

“What’s this talk I hear?” The brothers jumped at the shrill voice that broke the air of tension. Bellatrix walked swiftly into the parlour, Rodolphus following close behind. Orion and Walburga appeared to still be busy. “Something about Hogwarts?”

“Oh, yes,” Sirius smiled politely, looking directly at Regulus.  _ Merlin, spare me.  _ “Reggie here is quite nervous about going off for his first year, aren’t you?” 

_ Damn you, Sirius.  _ “Oh, really?” Bellatrix cooed, turning her attention to Regulus. She had always had a soft spot for him, for better or for worse. “There’s really nothing to be worried about, ickle Reggie, you’re the definition of a Slytherin, if I’ve ever seen one.” Her voice was saccharine, grating against Regulus’ eardrums.

“You said that about  _ him  _ too,” Regulus replied, nodding towards Sirius with a pointed look.  _ Two can play at this game, brother.  _

“Well,” Bellatrix said briskly, “There’s still hope for him, right Sirius?” No nicknames for him.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” Sirius said sweetly. “Speaking of sleeping, where are you and Mr LeStrange staying now that you’re home?” Regulus thanked Sirius in his head for diverting her attention away from the subject; perhaps they’d both survive this visit yet.

“Oh, I’m so glad you asked!”  _ Worked like a charm.  _ The two listened as their cousin went on and on about their plans now that their wedding, which had landed the week before School was out for Christmas last year, was over with, and their months-long ‘honeymoon’ which mainly consisted of traveling through Europe for ‘family meetings’ had finally ended.

“Tea for the Messrs and company,” Kreacher’s voice announced in one of the fleeting moments of silence between Bellatrix’s never ending monologue. There was a snapping of fingers, and a full service appeared on the coffee table before them all, pausing the stream of dialogue for a few moments as the four of them made their tea to taste. Sirius made a face at all the sugar Regulus put in his; he always took his black, no milk or anything.

Regulus stuck his tongue out at his brother, before turning to the house elf who lingered at the door. “Thank you, Kreacher,” he nodded, dismissing him.

Bellatrix frowned at Regulus. “Why do you bother thanking them? They’ll do it anyway, and if they don’t, you know what happens.” She tilted her head in the direction of the corridor, filled with the framed heads of house elves past.

“Don’t say things like that! And is there really any harm in being nice to them?”

“It’s true,” Bellatrix shrugged, seemingly unbothered by Regulus’ upset over the thought of hurting Kreacher. “They need to know their place, is all. We’re wizards, they’re not.”

Regulus wanted to protest, but Sirius shot him a look before he could open his mouth.  _ Leave it. Please.  _ Regulus obliged, quietly sipping his tea as Bellatrix resumed her gossip, which now concerned other families instead of the extension of their own. “Did you two hear that another Rosier went off and married a Squib, of all things? Couldn’t believe it, I thought that their integrity…” 

It was all the same things; Heirs marrying outside of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, children being sorted outside of their family houses, chat that Sirius and Regulus had already heard at Sunday dinner. The rest of the visit was taken up by this talk, until Rodolphus, who hadn’t said a word to anyone the entire visit, quietly prompted Bellatrix about another meeting they couldn’t be late for. “Good day, boys,” Bellatrix said, hugging the two of them, much the brothers’ reluctance. As Regulus felt her bony arms wrap tightly around his middle, he heard that shrill voice say cheerfully, “Remember your duties to the House of Black, Reggie. Have a wonderful first year, you’ll love the dungeons.” 

Regulus did his best to keep from visibly shaking until he was back in his room, finally letting out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. He checked his watch; there was still an hour before dinner, and his parents were still tucked away in the study. They seemed to be cooped up somewhere private more often that not over the past year, and Regulus was dreadfully lonely, which had only been exacerbated when Sirius had been at school. He didn’t even have the governess, for she had been dismissed on Regulus’ tenth birthday. 

However, wallowing in self-pity wasn’t productive, and if he wanted some company and comfort he knew where to find it. Regulus picked himself up and left his room, going down the corridor to gently knock on Sirius’ door. It quickly opened, revealing his brother who had a similar loneliness close to the surface. “Need something?” He asked, his eyebrows knitted.

“Just some company,” Regulus said, giving a tiny smile.

“Of course,” Sirius smiled back, opening the door further to let Regulus into his bedroom. His floor was covered in books and clothes, and his school trunk was open. He must have been packing; Regulus had already packed and repacked his own trunk three times by now. “Bella sure knows how to hold a conversation, huh?” he joked, picking up a pile of clothes and dropping it in his trunk. 

Regulus closed the door behind him, crossing the room to pull out the jumbled laundry. “If you don’t want to fold it yourself, you know I will,” he said, bypassing a proper response to Sirius’ jibe as he began neatly folding the clothes and stacking them back inside the trunk.

“Thanks Mum.” Sirius rolled his eyes. “Ready for Hogwarts?”

“More ready than you, considering more of your things are on the floor than in your trunk.”

“Oh, you know what I mean!” Sirius tutted. “Like, are you mentally prepared?”

“Sure.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Not a real answer!”

“You know I’m nervous, Sirius!” Regulus glared at his brother.  _ Here comes the wave again.  _ Regulus had to swallow and look away, blinking rapidly.

“Nervous about what?” Sirius played dumb. Or maybe he wasn’t, and he was somehow as dim as their parents made him out to be.

“You know what! Sorting! Making friends! Homework!”

“Reggie, you’re the brightest person I know. And you’ve always been a real charmer, everyone likes you. You’ve got nothing to worry about!” Sirius was getting annoyed, he could feel it. “You worry so much, Merlin.”

“Alright, then what about the Sorting?” Regulus dropped the book in his hands, letting it fall into the trunk with a  _ thud _ . They both flinched at the noise, Sirius more than Regulus.

“Reggie, what  _ about  _ the Sorting-”

“Would you  _ stop  _ calling me that!” Regulus snapped. “What if I don’t get sorted into Slytherin? What if I disappoint everyone? What if I’m like  _ you _ ?” 

Sirius’ face dropped. Regulus flinched away as soon as he felt the wave. It wasn’t like his; Sirius’ waves were violent, white with rage, not unlike their mother’s.  _ I didn’t mean it like that,  _ Regulus tried to plead silently, choking up so hard he couldn’t trust his own voice. His head was starting to hurt, as if the two waves were crashing against each other, roaring in his ears.  _ Please, Sirius, I’m sorry, please- _

“Trust me,” Sirius said coldly. “You’re nothing like me.”

Regulus turned and fled before Sirius could see the tears, not even stopping to shut the door. He remained in his room for the rest of the night, unable to stop the silent tracks of tears that covered his face.  _ Crybaby Reggie.  _

Dinner was served to his room via a teleportation spell; his parents were still busy. He absently wondered if Sirius was writing to his friends. Once again, the loneliness crept up his spine, seeping into the deepest parts of him like winter frost.


End file.
